| Here I am, Once Again |
[Apr. 8th, 2006|11:48 am] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | Auburn | ] |
| [ | mood |
| |  groggy | ] |
Spring Break was so nice! It was really good to get to have some time off just to relax. Well maybe not relax because when you have a boyfriend like I do, he always has something planned out for us when I first get home from school. He's constantly going and I LOVE going with him. Really, I do. Most people would be like, "Do you ever sleep in?" Not when I'm with him. My goal when I do get to see is to spend as much time awake with him as possible and I think that's his goal too. So that's what we do. I don't mind missing out on sleep. Even during spring break.
Bert and I went to the beach and stayed at a condo for five days also, which was nice. Funny how being at the beach makes you wanna be at the lake. Or it did me anyway. Being home when it's warm like it was 2 weeks ago just makes me excited for summer!!! Last summer was so amazing, I can only imagine what his one will bring.
Then it was over. Just like that, I had to come back to Auburn and get thrown back into 17 hours of coursework. It's terrible. BAH! If this semester would just end already, we wouldn't have this problem. Oh and I need to correct myself on my last entry... I won't graduate in December 2008, it'll be December 2007, which is even better. I don't know how we came up with that, but we did. Anyway, I have a lot of things to be doing around the house so I'm signing off now! |
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| It's been awhile..... |
[Mar. 7th, 2006|09:40 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  sleepy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Miranda Lambert - Kerosene | ] |
I haven't updated in awhile so I thought I would while I had all these thoughts flowing through my head. Well, when DON'T I have thoughts runnin' through my head? I am the queen of thoughts!!
School is going to kill me this semester. And if it doesn't, it will by the time I graduate. Which Sarah and I figured out that if I go full time, year round, I can be done by December of 2008. Not bad for someone who is going to have to commit academic suicide to get there huh? Oh well, it's my own fault for screwing around so many semesters before now. Thank God for Lane... he motivates me so much to do well but I hope it's not all in vain. Sometimes, I'm afraid it may be and I know that's not a good thing...
But speaking of Lane, things are generally good. I really can't complain. I mean I suppose I could complain but I choose not to because I love him. I think if I keep saying that I love him, he may even say it back one day! Of course, I don't say it to him, what do ya'll think I'm crazy?? He knows it though. If I didn't love him, I wouldn't spend so much time making myself exhausted thinking about him and rushing home to see him when Friday afternoon rolled around. And I do mean EVERY Friday afternoon. There are few and far between Fridays that I don't go home. Am I tired? OF COURSE!! I'm freakin' exhausted! I stay tired though and I figure if it weren't because of him, it would be because of something else and probably something much less worthwhile! So as usual, ya'll get to hear how much I love him and blah blah blah. And I'm still holding on....
But spring break is coming up! So that's something to look forward to huh? Oh yes, I think it is! |
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| Fear and Loathing in Auburn, AL |
[Jan. 26th, 2006|04:36 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  busy | ] |
I have been so exhausted the last 2 weeks. Taking 17 hours may not have been the best idea. I did it because someone kept telling me to hurry and get more hours so I could hurry and get out of school. Then he tries to break up with me. I'm not about to do this break-up, get back together, break-up, get back together thing... so high school. Either you try and you keep trying for me because I'm busting my ass for you or.... OKAY. I almost said something mean there. Anyway, back to the school thing. I really think they have decided at Auburn that it would be best to try and get us all to kill ourselves by giving us so much work to do. And it's work in stupid classes.
And when I sat down to think about how I can't wait for this weekend so I can rest some, I remembered how busy I'm gonna be at home and how much rest I'm NOT gonna get! SUCKS! |
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| Time to UPDATE!!! |
[Jan. 11th, 2006|05:19 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  calm | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Jem-They | ] |
I didn't realize how long it had been since I updated this thing! Geez, what was I thinkin'? Oh, I wasn't, thats right. I had finals and Christmas break and now I have a full load of classes.... 17 hours worth! Sounds fun huh? I faired decently in all my classes last semester. I didn't fail anything but there was one grade I would've liked to have done better in. Oh well, nothing can be done now. This semester however, I'm signed up for 17 hours and yes, I want to shoot myself in the face. It's only the third day of the semester, so this is not a good sign.
Christmas break was AMAZING! I had so much fun being at home with Lane and the family and all my friends. What could be better but a little R&R after all the work I did last semester? Lane and I are getting along so well too. I had had my doubts at the start of the summer, but now I'm starting to realize that this may very well be for real and that NOTHING can stop that. He gave me a beautiful string of pearls and a very nice watch for Christmas, along with some other things. Not to mention the gorgeous white gold and diamond cross his mom and step-dad gave me and the other stuff I got from his family. I had to take a step back and ask myself, "IS this what it really feels like?" I guess it must be. I am so blessed.
Bert turned 21 over the holidays too. We threw her a small get together of just some old friends from high school at my house. It was fun! She enjoyed it and that's all that matters. What was wrong with her got set right that night, which is good. Everything ALWAYS falls into place, especially with the Lord's help. I had been praying for her and I think it may have worked. All that matters is that she had a good time on her 21st!!!
So now school is back in and all I wanna do is be back home. :( Sad but true. There are some out there who will ask me why I love Robertsdale so much. But home is where the heart is and everyone within the sound of my voice knows there is someone very special back there in that place I once hated who has my heart now! |
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| The Daily Grind |
[Nov. 27th, 2005|08:31 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  indifferent | ] |
| [ | music |
| | none | ] |
Well life starts back up as soon as I am done writing this entry. Thanksgiving break was wonderful for the most part. Not many complaints, other than bronchitis... sucks. No voice on Tuesday, fever on Wednesday, and no appetite on Thursday. FUN. So most of the week I just hung out in bed, napping and spending time with the family. It was nice to get to do that. It's not something that happens very often. Going home is something I do a lot but not something I REALLY do. Most of the time I go to see Lane, not go home. No ones usually there but him on weekends anyway.
On that note, it seems that I have been doing some things unconsciously that has hurt some peoples feelings. I have been spreading myself too thin when it comes to those of you who have been there for me in the past. You know who you are but Molly and I had a slight confrontation tonight and I don't know how well it went. It ended up being a lot of finger pointing and "I don't know how you think you can say that when you've done this too" kinda thing. Really nerve wracking. But the truth of the matter is that I had talked to Lane about this LAST NIGHT when I realized a certain someone was upset with me from how she acted on the phone..... I've been a rotten friend. I've been self-involved and unattentive. Not necessarily just to Molly because I think she's done just as much of it as I have in the past year (she however would disagree), but to everyone who I consider a true friend. There aren't that many of you but I think you all know who you are. You may not comment on these things but I know you read them. So if I have been ignoring you or not spending much time with you, I'm sorry for that. I have been wrapped up in Lane and I am dealing with this accordingly. This doesn't mean I'm gonna be going back to my old ways because I'm just not into that anymore. I can't handle that AND schoolwork. Plus, its just not me. I HAVE changed and if that's what's making everyone so angry at me then I really didn't have any friends to begin with I suppose. But I know what ya'll have been getting at I know I've been wrong.
Now, I shot my first deer this weekend... very exciting. Kinda gross when she bled all over me and dad while we were getting her into the bed of the truck (lung shot) but thats how it goes. My dad was elated. Literally, he was tickled pink. Lane was excited for me too. He was hunting somewhere else. He shot one too but when he went to go get it, he wished he wouldn't have shot. It's ok though, he got over it. Oh well, this hunting stuff isn't too hard. I got a lot of reading done while I was waiting for the deer to actually walk out! =) HA! Now I have to work on a paper, which means that school is starting back again! Only 3 more weeks so it's not gonna be too bad. But this paper is gonna be a bitch to write. Have a good week! |
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| 6 months of a REAL relationship!! |
[Nov. 16th, 2005|03:35 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  excited | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Allison Krauss and Union Station | ] |
Yeah that was yesterday... 6 months of me and Lane! I managed somehow to let my stress level get to me and to cause an argument but its all good! We work through everything like they are mere bumps in the road. We haven't even started hitting big potholes yet!!
3 more days until I get to go home and SEE HIM!!! It's been 2 whole weeks and I'm starving for some attention!
Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire comes out Friday and so does Walk The Line... is everyone else as excited as I am?!?! Someone is getting to go see Harry Potter Sunday night... hehehe
ME!!!!!!
Now if I can just make it through the rest of the week.... I'll be home free, literally. |
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| Recovery & Discovery |
[Nov. 12th, 2005|07:53 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | calm | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Kenny Chesney - Who You'd Be Today | ] |
The last few days have been sorta rough, but I'm surviving. It's involved a lot of confusion and a lot of me spending time alone thinking and contemplating who I am and where my heart is. If any of you have ever had one of those days where you just wanna be alone and not have anyone in your face or in your business, this has been me for the past 2 days.
It's not that I have anything to complain about... I don't! Things have been going very well. But sometimes, everyone deserves a breakdown. And when that breakdown occurs, it's a no holds barred situation. Particularly when its been so long since you've had one. My conclusion thus far (meaning I'm not totally done deciding what to do with all these feelings and emotions) has been that I have to sit tight and be patient but keep holding on strong to what I believe is best for me. If that line is crossed, I have to do what I think is the best course of action.
Its so hard having to think about things like this, things that could be potentially life-altering, and have to go to school, and have 4 choir performances in one week. But Thanksgiving break is only a week away so maybe being able to go home and see Lane is just what I need to get my mind right.
It's also been rough not being able to be there for him this last week. Robertsdale has claimed another life and it just had to be one of his close friends from back in high school. I knew when it happened that he would be sorta nonchalant about it but then as soon as he went to the wake, he got upset and is now in a weird sort of mood about life. I wanted to be there, because I lost a close friend a little over a year ago to the same thing and it is something so difficult to go through alone. He won't talk until he's ready though. Everyone remember Lee's family and pray for them please. |
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| Updating for what purpose again?!? |
[Nov. 7th, 2005|10:36 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  drained | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Lindsay Lohan - Confessions of a Broken Heart | ] |
So these last few weeks have been sorta on the hectic side. The sad part about that is that I'm afraid that life is gonna stay that way: hectic, chaotic, outta control. Okay, so maybe outta control is a stretch considering all I do is school, school, spend time with Lane, school, study for school, choir stuff, spend time with Lane.... you get my drift. The only things I've been enjoying though is spending time with Lane and the choir stuff. Choir is gonna be taking up a lot of time here in the next week and half. We have our fall concert this Sunday and then next week we'll be having extra rehearsals for Sounds of Auburn and then the Iron Bowl performance and then those actual performances take palce on Thursday and Saturday of next week! SEE!!!! WOW!!!! At the same time, I have tons of assignments at school going on. 2 papers to work on, oral presentations, discussion leaderships to lead in class. Doctors appointments (because we all know I LOVE the doctor) that are never ending!!! I just want my Thanksgiving break! After Thanksgiving break all I'll have to do is study for finals. At the same time I have a boyfriend at home that I love very much but dont know how much I'll be able to focus on until Thanksgiving. It really makes me sad. =(
So all that being said, I'm going to finish homework I didnt do last night from being utterly EXHAUSTED!! Hope ya'll have a good week! |
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| Let's get to it then!! |
[Oct. 24th, 2005|10:01 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  cheerful | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Keith Urban - Memories of Us | ] |
I registered for my classes! YAY!!! How exciting huh? Ok, now I'm done being chipper. I really only had to make one minor adjustment to my schedule and the only bad thing is that I have an 8am class MWF.... =( POO! But I got everything else that I wanted so I'm happy! 17 hours...... I think I might die trying to graduate but hey, whatever I have to do right? If I'm too dead to enjoy my diploma then it'll just have to be that way!
I'm getting sick this week b/c Lane and I were outside in the chilly air Saturday night and I forgot my jacket at my house. So my throat is kinda sore and stuff. But I must press on. There is only a litte over a month left in the semester (Thank u GOD!) so it's time to kick it into overdive and do my thang!!! Yeah I just said "thang." That was my ghetto-ness for the day. If you were not here to witness it, then I'm sorry. It's going to be a hyper Monday leading up to a long week.
This weekend was nice though. It was busy, but nice. Lane and I had a bad argument last Thursday so I rushed home Friday afternoon to take care of it. But things were patched up quickly and everything was good. We picked a "song" and it was the one I wanted anyways so I'm happy about that.... to see song, refer below after reading. There can be good points that come from tears on a Thursday. He gave me some excellent ideas for Christmas presents, so I can start saving up.... he should really stop hating on my expensive taste... his is somewhat expensive too! =) I should tell him I said that huh? Anyways, he's supposed to be coming up here this weekend for a long weekend and I'm so excited. Almost 6 months since we've been dating..... 6 MONTHS!!! AND STILL GOING STRONG!!! No signs of stoping, unless somoene knows something I don't. =( I thank The Lord everyday for someone like him.... I finally got it right this time!
Alright party people, I must go.... lots to read before class... musn't fall behind! Later! |
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| The Survey says.... |
[Oct. 19th, 2005|11:09 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  bored | ] |
| [ | music |
| | I'm Goin' Down - Mary J Blidge | ] |
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